Senior dating 101

Where can seniors go on dates?  Well, here we are, two widowed seniors, eight years apart, wanting to spend quality time getting to know each other. When we were young (a lifetime ago), discos were the “in” place to go for drinks and dancing.  Well, apparently, there are no more discos around, and music places today play music that’s alien to our ears.    

Early in the dating game, we would spend long hours over dinner chatting, not realizing we were the only ones left until a tired and sleepy waiter would approach us announcing it was closing time. We wanted to spend more time together and listen to music, and so we would make the round of hotel lounges, only to be told, once again, that it was the entertainers’ last set. Why, we even traveled as far as Tagaytay’s Taal Vista Lounge to listen to music, but they still closed at two am.  

So what to do?  Get creative!  Here’s what we came up with:

Hospital Visits.  With senior-hood, health becomes an issue, and so doctor’s appointments for blood tests and heart check-ups become par for the course.  So with chiropractor visits.  Hence, accidental meetings at hospital lounges became common, while waiting for the doctor to arrive. Soon, we had our favorite corner and he would PM me that if I came much later, he would start etching our initials on our favorite chairs.  Much later, after getting over our embarrassment, we started sharing and comparing each other’s medical test results.  And then we started seeing the same doctors to make dating easier, and so we would be abreast with each other’s health issues.

Supermarket Shopping.  Never having entered the supermarket while his wife was alive, my partner had no clue what to buy for his home or how to navigate the aisles.  He needed help now to make a list of supplies and locate them at the supermarket.  Here’s where I came in with my years of experience.  Once I asked him to pick up deboned chicken for my Christmas relleno, and he bravely went in search of it with nary a clue where to find it.  Luckily, the supermarket manager took pity on him and helped him out.  But then, he forgot to collect the chicken bones for the broth, and so had to make another trip.  What hapless shoppers men are!

Automobile Sales and Repairs.  When I needed to get new tires for my car, have the brakes repaired, a dent or scratch fixed, or determine what new car to buy, he was always great with sound advice as to the best places to get things done.  

The Palms Country Club.  From breakfast to wine and cheese nights, the Country Club is a favorite rendezvous, so much so that he even bought his own share at my club.  Seniors wake up early, and starting the day with each other, enjoying a warm bowl of healthy oatmeal with skimmed milk, flax seeds, Palawan honey and cheese, sets the mood for the rest of the day.  And for those days where we throw caution (and diets) out of the window, a delicious waffle with fried egg, bacon, and sausages makes the day even better.

Saturday Market.  Meandering through the morning stalls, buying fresh fruit, regional favorites and homemade delicacies, and ending up eating a hearty brunch is heaven, especially when there’s a driver to carry stuff for us later.  We love gastronomic adventures, and so we’re always in search of the best croissants, the best oatmeal cookies, the best crab rolls, or the best burgers.

S&R.  Hey, did you know you could get full eating food samples while window-shopping at S&R? And it’s a great place to find items you need for the home, plus those delicious mixed nuts that make for perfect snacking while watching movies.  He keeps me from splurging on things I don’t need, and I stop him from reaching out for sugary goodies that makes his blood sugar go haywire.

Movies.  I never knew there were date chairs at the last row of movie houses and that you could put up the armrest in between chairs for more space until we started watching movies. Thing is, we’re always surrounded by teenagers, and they get embarrassed when this white-haired man and his date hold hands.  Best of all, there’s always senior discount!  

Netflix.  And then, for rainy days, nothing beats watching movies on Netflix, while snacking on wine and cheese.  He gets to choose his favorite blockbuster war and crime movie this time, and I get my romance, drama and comedy fix the next.

Home Kitchens.  Trying out new recipes together and then enjoying them make for great dates.  Or just nibbling on appetizers like herring, olives, pate, cheese and crackers.  He introduces me to his way of eating curry (lots of side dishes and chutney please!) and he gets to try my bottarga.

Long Walks.  Ten thousand steps per day equal an hour’s walk around the village. We alternate villages: sometimes his, other times mine. More than the exercise, it’s the conversations that matter, especially when holding hands, never mind if they are sweaty. We love discussing architecture as we walk along the village roads. And when it’s raining, we can always go to the gym and hit the treadmills.

Even Longer Provincial Drives.  Listening to music or talking while driving up to Tagaytay or Alfonso make for relaxing time together.  And getting lost on spontaneous adventures is fun when spent with your special someone.  After all, there’s always Waze to help you find your way back.  

Church.  Hearing mass and praying together binds us closer to each other.  

Time spent traveling together is precious, but this I will talk about next time.  So there, an even dozen date ideas to start with on your senior dating experience.  Enjoy!